Friday, June 27, 2008

If only...

"I'd be able to grab life and run with it if only....."

When life is not working it is natural to try to shirk responsibility by finding anyone or anything to blame other than ourselves. Looking at Adam and Eve in the Garden, we can see people have been trying to get off the hook by blaming others from the beginning. Let's see how much more we can thrive as we overcome blame-shifing.

Today I want to share with you a recent post from written by Elder Ben Reaoch.

"Our proud hearts send us desperately looking for someone else to point to every time we’re confronted with our own sin. There must be someone else—our spouse, sibling, parent, boss, co-worker, pastor, friend, or God, himself. We are so desperate to justify ourselves that we become irrational.

Here are 12 examples.
1) Anger I wouldn’t lose my temper if my co-workers were easier to get along with, or if my kids behaved better, or if my spouse were more considerate.

2) Impatience I would be a very patient person if it weren’t for traffic jams and long lines in the grocery store. If I didn’t have so many things to do, and if the people around me weren’t so slow, I would never become impatient!

3) Lust I would have a pure mind if there weren’t so many sensual images in our culture.

4) Anxiety I wouldn’t worry about the future if my life were just a little more secure—if I had more money, and no health problems.

5) Spiritual Apathy My spiritual life would be so much more vibrant and I would struggle with sin less if my small group were more encouraging, or if Sunday school were more engaging, or if the music in the worship service were more lively, or if the sermons were better.

6) Insubordination If my parents/bosses/elders were godly leaders, then I would joyfully follow them.

7) A Critical Spirit It’s not my fault that the people around me are ignorant and inexperienced.

8) Bitterness If you knew what that person did to me, you would understand my bitterness. How could I forgive something like that?

9) Gluttony My wife/husband/roommate/friend is a wonderful cook! The things they make are impossible to resist.

10) Gossip It’s the people around me who start the conversations. There’s no way to avoid hearing what others happen to say. And when others ask me questions, I can’t avoid sharing what I know.

11) Self-Pity I’ll never be happy, because my marriage/family/job/ministry is so difficult.

12) Selfishness I would be more generous if we had more money. Making excuses like this is arrogant and foolish. It’s a proud way of trying to justify our actions and pacify our guilty consciences. And it keeps us from humbling ourselves before God to repent of our sins and seek his forgiveness.

Consider James 1:13-15, which leaves us with no way of escaping our own sin and guilt. We cannot blame God, for he “cannot be tempted with evil, and he himself tempts no one.” Instead, we have to accept the humbling truth that “each person is tempted when he is lured and enticed by his own desire.” This will end the blame game, and it will send us pleading for Christ’s mercy and grace. " -


Please send in your dealings with blame games. I must confess I have been guilty of all of the above on more than one occasion. Coming to see that God never wastes anything in the lives of His children, I don't need to play the blame game. When the pressure rises the temptation to lament, "If only..." always raises its head. How about you?

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© 2008 Kay Martin

Thrive In Christ

Who I Am In Christ by Neil Anderson

For several months we will center on this book to pursue Thriving in our Christian journey.

Neil challenges us with: "Do you know who you are in God's eyes? We are no longer products of our past. We are primarily products of Christ's work on the cross. Who we are determines what we do.

You are not who you are in Christ because of the things you have done, you are in Christ because of what He has done. He died and rose again so that you and I could live in the FREEDOM of His love."

That's just the introduction. More to follow.