Controlling or being controlled is directly connected to lack of faith of God directly working in my life.
I ask myself often, "Am I trying to control this situation or this person?" I know the need to be in control is present in all folks in many different methods. For over 20 years I have worked with mentors, quiet time with the Lord to overcome my controlling and being controlled coping methods. Freedom in Christ is the only way to live!!!
Here are a few danger signs I've learned:
* Need to know all answers up front; and cannot wait patiently to how events evolve or what other people have planned in their lives.
* Lack trust in other people's competency or the power of God to care of details in life.
* Constant questioning, badgering and second-guessing of others' decisions.
* Believing no one can have a plan as good or better than my plan.
*Feeling I have the right to tell others what they need to do.
* Easily becoming irritable, frustrated or angry when others don't do what I wanted.
Now that I know God is intimately involved in my life I don't fall into these traps. I believe the basis of the problem for most controlling people is really the lack of trust in God. Proverbs 3:5-6 says, "Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight."
The Bible shows us over and over God is trustworthy!!!
Philippians 4:6-7 says, "Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus."
Of course God is the One Who is in control anyway. Matthew 6:27 states,
"Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life?"
A controlling person begins to relinquish control when they surrender their concerns to the Lord. 1 Peter 5:7 challenges people to "Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you."
What do you say about control issues being directly related to trust or the lack of trust in God?
2 comments:
I am painfully appreciating this series. It's like performing mini-surgery with each one I read! Thank you for being obedient in writing this & allowing God to work through you. He has shown me some things that I never identified as passive - agressive! I have been absolutely GREAT at a couple of these things - whew...scary.
Ouch, my toes are getting black and blue! Much needed :-) I know beyond a shadow of any doubt that personally, my control issues are all about not trusting God. Don't get me wrong, I DO trust God. It's just that in some situations when I don't think He will do what I want or when I want it to be done, I have a tendency to jump in and try to manipulate Him into action. Not the right approach, for sure! Kay, you are right on target with this series. Thank you for listening to God and writing these posts!
Hugs,
Molly
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