Wednesday, August 26, 2009

Can I Handle Blessings?

The last twelve years have been challenging. If you're new to wholehearted Christianity let me interpret that phrase for you: Life Has been Hard!!! There were times I wasn't sure I'd make it, but God showed up at every turn just in time. How bad was it Kay? Well some things are personal but let me take all the air out and list a few challenges:

Family: brain tumors, lung cancer, marriage crisis, money fears, other health challenges, witness to child molestation,
unsure of career direction, hearing God's call to write but not finding my voice to fulfill call, mother's illness and then becoming her total care-giver in my
home for several years, husband's sudden illness and death, handling the closing of busy medical office suddenly.....CHALLENGES.

In the last few weeks I have been blessed financially, answered prayers for family and friends, great new job, writing opportunities, help remodeling my home, and a sense of rest in God
I've prayed for.

But yesterday I was phoned by my cpa to setup an appointment. I sighed when he called. My greatest fears must have been realized, the IRS wanted more money than I had anticipated. But he wanted the meeting to go over some possible medical group investment that I might be eligible to receive money from since my husband had died.

I should have been elated, but I had no where to place all this. I have been in "make it" mode for so long I had no familiar coping for one favor and blessing after another. A friend phoned me immediately after this call with a need for prayer on some difficult times in her life. Then I felt guilty that she had this hardship and I was being blessed.

I happened to have "Everyone Loves Raymond" on the television. The episode playing showed Raymond winning writer of the year. He was sharing his good news with his family. By the time his dad and mom picked it apart he was deflated and they accused him of bragging. When he got back to his home his wife gave him the bad news that his new position would force him to cover the sled races in Alaska. This was a terrible assignment. Ray smiled and la
ughed. His wife was puzzled. Raymond explained, "For a few minutes I thought I could believe this award and promotion meant I was in a good successful place. This was new for me, but just maybe it was my turn. But now that you tell me this I realize I'm not the one who has things work out for me. I live in a hard place; life is always hard for me."

Sadly, I could identify with Raymond. The fear of disappointment can cancel out the joy in a time of blessing. God is having to help me learn how to receive all of His blessings at one time. I've been climbing up hill with danger all around for many years. I, like Raymond, got accustomed to walking with trouble. The Bible shows this same mindset in the Israelites after God delivered them. I refuse to act like the Israelites who couldn't embrace the unfamiliarity of the Promised Land, because they got too accustomed to desert living.

Yes, I know the "desert," but I am adaptable and I know the giants are big in this new land. But the faithful God in the desert is also faithful in the Promised Land. I don't walk in my own knowing; no, I am surrendered and belong to the Lord Jesus Christ.

Thank You, Lord, for the life You give me. I know You in loss,
pain, and when nothing seems to be working. Lord, I thank You when blessings come my way that can logically seem impossible.

This is the day that You have made and I rejoice in it!!! New terrain, new skills, and thanking You, Lord God, for all things:
  • up, down
  • cold, hot
  • peace, war
  • lack, plenty
  • solitude, crowded
  • full, empty
  • heard, ignored
  • validated, invisible
"This is the day that the Lord has made; let us rejoice and be glad in it." - Psalm 118:24


Beams of Light Ministries said...

Hey Kay!

Thanks for stopping by my blog earlier. I like your post today. As I was reading it, this passage came to mind from Phil. 4:11-13

11 Not that I speak in respect of want: for I have learned, in whatsoever state I am, therewith to be content.

12 I know both how to be abased, and I know how to abound: every where and in all things I am instructed both to be full and to be hungry, both to abound and to suffer need.

13 I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me.

You can do all things Kay because you have the Lord on your side!

Love ya!

Dorothy Champagne said...

I feel in those times of blessings, when you start to get excited about what God is doing in your life - is right about the same time satan tries to come in and pull that rug out from under your feet. OOOOh I hate it when he does that. I try to recognize it before it's too late, but he's so sneaky and so does not want us to be happy, especially in Christ.

Marilyn in Mississippi said...

I wish I could pen my thoughts down like you can Kay. I'm so glad that you are on the receiving end of some blessings right now. Enjoy! Mississippi

Bradley J. Moore said...

Whew, Kay! What a journey! You are surely helping others with the wonderful perspective you are giving here. We all go through these ups and downs - sometimes all together, which makes me a littl dizzy. I think the key words you used were "surrendered" and "adaptable"

Good for you.

© 2008 Kay Martin

Thrive In Christ

Who I Am In Christ by Neil Anderson

For several months we will center on this book to pursue Thriving in our Christian journey.

Neil challenges us with: "Do you know who you are in God's eyes? We are no longer products of our past. We are primarily products of Christ's work on the cross. Who we are determines what we do.

You are not who you are in Christ because of the things you have done, you are in Christ because of what He has done. He died and rose again so that you and I could live in the FREEDOM of His love."

That's just the introduction. More to follow.