Thursday, October 9, 2008

Loneliness #IV: Relationship - God's Way

"Folks Will Hit My Last Nerve and Sometimes It's Just Easier to Avoid The Pain and Get On With Life By Myself!!! Jesus and I can work these issues out. When life smooths out I'll get back to the church folks and plug into missions etc. Right now I'm not up to putting up with people aggravating me." That isn't my quote today, but in some tough life battles I had some of those thoughts. Fear of conflict and being overwhelmed may be part of the bondage and trap of the lonely (outside and inside the church.)

How did we get here to lonely statistics baffling the theologians, the medical community, the social workers, and the anthropologists?

I shared some of the tough stuff from my childhood, but I have some wonderful saints in my lineage. My maternal grandmother was an amazing North Georgian hilly rocky working farm saint. She had 13 children and she lived through losing one of her two sons when he was two years old. She made her own soap; cooked on a wood stove; put up all the food her family ate all year. She designed and made beautiful dresses and clothes for her 11 daughters who were all shapes and fashion challenges. The pictures of these girls looks like Chanel designed everything they wore.

That was Mamie's day life. She had a gift of helping the sick get well and she was a self taught midwife. Many of her nights were up with sick whooping cough babies or delivering babies for black and whites in those hills. They were too far out for the doctors to come in emergencies. I don't believe Mamie had any lonely issues. Now she'd known great hardship...wars, depression, droughts, two houses burned to the ground by lightning. Those are the big ones along with my blessed Grandaddy losing his hearing from lightning in one of those storms.

When the blues, lonely tugs come to me I claim out loud that I am my grandmother's grandchild. There may have been some "issues" in my parents, and they had great qualities. I am believing Christ in me and the lineage God blessed me with is more than enough for circumstances to overwhelm me. Who is that teacher, relative, friend that has modeled for you how to pick yourself up and connect?

You who are lonely: make baby steps and move toward others. Just like Sailor Cross wrote in and admitted she sometimes feels lonely even at church. She's a knitter. She had an aha moment and plans to start a knitting group to make some connections. Why not you initiate something that will connect you with others who may have similar interests? Why not?

You who don't have any lonely issues.......get at it. Pray for God to show you who needs a smile, an invitation to a meal, a phone call, a note. I promise He will show you someone who's hoping that someone will validate they exist and they have value.

What if?


Pinkshoelady said...

Hey there my sweet friend,
I can relate to your post. Even though I am a Pastor's wife a teacher, a speaker, and an extreme extravert, I still sometimes feel lonely.
It seems that I am the one who stays in contact, and does the inviting.
That's one reason I love bloggyland! People actually contact me too.
Thanks so much for your visits and words of encouragement.

I especially love to read your stories about your relatives. I can sooooo relate.
Keep sharing my sister and together we will touch others hearts.
We are not alone.

Angela @ Refresh My Soul Blog said...

I can relate to this. It is easy to still feel lonely with little ones running around.

Everyone needs to know they are valued.
Much love,

sailorcross said...

Oh, I know exactly who helped me through a very lonely time when I was just a little girl (SO MANY YEARS AGO!!). I think I'll blog about her today when I come home from work.

It's amazing--I have a member of my Small Group who will call me for no reason and just say, "I thought I would call you today and make sure you're okay. Is there anything you need me to do for you? I love you."

And what an uplifting, encouraging phone call!! Here is a man with 4 young children, a very busy life, yet he takes 5-10 minutes to reach out to me!

I just feel that God has given me my spiritual family to replace my own family who have ostracized me due to my beliefs. And what a family I now have!!

And that family includes the people I have met through blogging--people I more than likely will never meet in this life on earth--but someday I will meet them in Heaven.


© 2008 Kay Martin

Thrive In Christ

Who I Am In Christ by Neil Anderson

For several months we will center on this book to pursue Thriving in our Christian journey.

Neil challenges us with: "Do you know who you are in God's eyes? We are no longer products of our past. We are primarily products of Christ's work on the cross. Who we are determines what we do.

You are not who you are in Christ because of the things you have done, you are in Christ because of what He has done. He died and rose again so that you and I could live in the FREEDOM of His love."

That's just the introduction. More to follow.